I'll Take "Windows Vista Kicked My Ass At Parcheesi For $200," Alex!

If you're a MegaNerd, you probably spotted this with glee on your iKindle NanoPod the other day.

In the tradition of Deep Blue vs. Gary Kasparav, I.B.M. is building a computer program to compete with human opponents on "The Alex Trebec Super-Happy FunTime Hour," commonly known as "Jeopardy!"

This is a feat. Whereas chess is a game with finite
rules and calculable movements, trivia is an open-ended realm, dominated by humans since Sir Thomas Gilmore invented the popular board game Trivial Pursuit in 1461 AD.*

While A.I. has made great strides in the last few years, I doubt I.B.M.'s Trivia-Droid will be able to muster the free association and language comp. needed to thwart Trebec's "Iron Gauntlet of Doom," commonly known as "Double Jeopardy!"

For now at least, reason, language, and assumption remain the last bastions of human intellectual
usefulness. However, I guarantee the computer will have a better commercial-break anecdote than the two Trekkie shut-ins on either side of it.

* This is a lie.

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6 comments:

Nicholas said...

A few months ago, a returning champion told the story was about how he was good at a game called "Cornhole." It was your standard "toss a bag in a hole" kind of game where something akin to a Hacky Sack is tossed at an object with a hole in it. A standard beach/picnic/tailgating game, but his name for it was awfully suspect.

To the computer's post-commercial story, I say beat that!

Matt Silverman said...

THIS ONE TIME I WAS BOOTING AND TOTALLY DID NOT REALIZE I HAD LEFT A DISC IN MY CD ROM DRIVE HA HA HA HA_

CORNHOLE_

Nicholas said...

I feel you don't believe the legitimacy of my story. His name was Tim McMahon and he won on March 4 only to lose on March 5.

Cornhole, lol.

Matt Silverman said...

I would never doubt your Jeopardy! authority! Did you FaceBook the cornholer?

Nicholas said...

No, I did not FB the cornholer. I have too many cornholers on my friends list as it is.

marissa said...

I will agree with Nick here. No mo' cornholes.

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